Chicago Bears Lose to the Atlanta Falcons down in Atlanta tonight! Booooo! (But, Jim Crawford, as well as my other friends from the South - please, stop gloating!)
In your workplace, in your business - have you ever been disrespected? Not just for making a mistake at some job-related task.
But have you been disrespected by someone painting a negative brush against your whole profession?
Many Lawyers know this - divorce attorneys, Personal Injury, Bankruptcy - all sharks, in many a layman's opinion!
Municipal Employees! Never work very hard, because, in many cases, they can not be fired (this is changing in many municipalities with the recession, however).
Sales People of all stripes - especially those working on commission - including those selling cars, home improvement items, and, of course, those in the Real Estate Profession. In the opinion of many, all sales people care about is earning a fat check - damn the clients.
True professionals, in any field, in any business, have to develop a tough outer skin in order to survive. But often times, does their evolving cynicism actually perpetuate those negative notions among clients or prospective clients?
Is disrespect - poor treatment by clients and customers against those in certain professions - earned? Expected? Even . . . Flat-Out Normal?
On a daily basis, on our Team, many of the prospective buyers and sellers we contact cancel meetings with what we know to be trumped-up, false reasons. They're not feeling well. Death in the family. Too busy this week - maybe next week, or the week after, or . . .
Often, in the Real Estate Profession, this notion of disrespect is often followed by an MLS Listing, the next day, with another Real Estate Practitioner. Perhaps one who was more agreeable to the client's fantasy wishes.
For Lawyers, Consultants, and all Sales Professionals - your follow up call is often not returned. Or, when a phone or email connection is made, the response from the disrespecting client is heavy irritation. Even anger! How dare you!
One of our very experienced colleagues here at Keller Williams Lincoln Square here in Chicago, Pamela (not her real name), recently worked hard for a Buyer Client our Team referred to her. After several unreturned telephone calls, the prospective buyer told her he was "not making any buy decision until early 2010. He will call back then!"
But her further investigation showed that this buyer had not only made an offer on another Downtown Chicago Loop Condominium, but that this transaction had already closed! In became final, in fact, two weeks before the "we're putting it off" phone call described here.
Luckily, my colleague had registered this errant client with the developer. Even more lucky for her, this developer was a large, respected one here in Chicago, and honored their written commitment to pay her a Buyer's Agent Co-op Fee.
She got compensated despite the fact the buyer himself asked the builder not to, and directed the builder "not to mention anything to the representing buyer's agent."
Disrespect! Complete disrespect!
But my guess is, as I write this late Sunday night, the offending buyer has no remorse. Doesn't care! Felt he did nothing at all wrong!
Pamela feels terrible because of her buyer client's disrespect, however! And more than a small piece of her trusting nature, and her faith in newly-introduced clients, has fallen away. It has been replaced by a sizable slice of suspicion. Cynicism. And her commitment to "never let this ever happen again."
Hey - has anything similar to this ever happened to you? Did you take it in stride, and move on?
Or, did you dwell on it, perhaps more than you should, feeling a bit violated? And did it make a permanent change in your subsequent business attitude?
Please share!
DEAN & DEAN'S TEAM CHICAGO
I was in the sewrvice business for a while and one of the things I love about this business is after the closing if you are working with a jerk you can waive goodbye !! Tough luck on the Bears . They started out really strong. I think that first quarter interception really hurt them
Plain and simple....people are doing anything they can to $ave money......but this is no exuse....but then again some buyers are liars from the start!
I had the very same thing happen with a Buyer i was working with going around to builders AFTER my initial introduction and thinking that I wouldn't get paid! But I did! I made sure the Buyer knew that I got paid!
The Developer was more than willing to pay me my commission since I had brought other Buyers through who bought as well. This business is changing as more people feel empowered by a little Real Estate knowledge. Everybody feels they are the expert and I sense I am giving out allot of FREE advice!
I had the very same thing happen with a Buyer i was working with going around to builders AFTER my initial introduction and thinking that I wouldn't get paid! But I did! I made sure the Buyer knew that I got paid!
The Developer was more than willing to pay me my commission since I had brought other Buyers through who bought as well. This business is changing as more people feel empowered by a little Real Estate knowledge. Everybody feels they are the expert and I sense I am giving out allot of FREE advice!
We use a Buyer-Broker Agreement from the first meeting with clients. Even that does not cover all situations, but most of them. We also work hard to figure out which agent took the sale so we know in the future when working with that agent that trust is an issue with them and their clients. Our attitude isl ike yours: our career is not based on one transaction and we only attract perfect clients. We do not want to work with people who are cheaters and connivers from the start. Who knows what could happen during the transaction or worse yet 1, 2, or even several years later? At least you found out upfront without wasting alot of time and energy on them. We also do what you and register them everywhere we can. At least they bought a new property or they may not have been a commission as all. Thanks for sharing. This is a good reminder for all of us to protect ourselves and the integrity of our prefession and not work for free. Our time is money. There are plenty of good clients out there who appreciate what we do and how we do it. Let's focus on them! Have a wonderful day!
Lori Bowers
The Lori Bowers Group
La Quinta, Ca.
As a Real Estate trainer, I always ask my agents to know why someone should hire them over others. The fact that I do that, I believe, helps insulate them from some of the naysayers.
Selling Real Estate, you have to have a deep belief that you can help and make a difference in others' lives or others will pull you down.
If you're great at what you do, then you simply shrug it off and think that others simply don't understand!!!
Dean - there are lousy buyers everywhere - but that was low....
Dean:
It is fortunate for Pamela that she was able to be paid for the transaction since she had pre-registered the buyer. Does she have any idea why the buyer tried to go around her? That seems odd unless they felt they were going to have financial gain for doing so. Another case for having a buyer broker agreement signed. They would have felt more compelled to stay with her.
It should not come as a surprise that something like this might happen from time to time. We do our best and try to determine if there is anything in the relationship that might hint potential disrespect. Pamela is fortunate she was paid anyway and should just move on. Time to focus on those you can help...unless she might want to see what her part in it might be. There are always two sides to a story. I say NEXT!
Real Estate is no place for the weak of heart. You must develop a tough skin to survive. I once had a "friend" use another buyer agent to purchase her new house because the agent was going to kick back part of the commission. My "friend" didn't even tell me she was house hunting. So she was sneaking around. Well this agent wasn't very experienced and my "friend" started calling asking me some pretty specific real estate questions. Once I figured it out I was livid. As it turned out the transaction was very bumpy, the agent didn't kick back a cent. My "friend" finally had to fess up to get me involved so it would close. Nearly cost a long time friendship. My friend did apologize saying the other agent was from her church and she knew she was broke so she was trying help her out. While that was admirable my friend should have told me that ahead of time and all would have been fine. Took a while to undo that damage. But the good news is after that my armour was complete nothing would ever be able to make me that angry/hurt again.
I couldn't fathom being this overtly and boastfully deceptive:
I had a phone call last night after 6 pm from a guy in Phx asking questions about a HUD home (I'm a HUD broker) and the market, etc.
I asked him first off, do you have an agent you are working with. NO.
He wanted me to email him this and that. Gives me all his contact info. He then tells me he is preapproved and will write an offer...wait for it...
with his agent in Phx who is a HUD broker and can bid him, etc.
I told him, uhhh you told me you were not working with an agent.
He says "I KNOW I DID. But I need that info now and MY AGENT DOESN'T WORK SUNDAYS."
I told him well sorry hun but my resources are for MY clients so you won't be receiving it from me. Good luck.
Just shameless how people will waste our time to get what they want...
I've heard a few people say that Realtors caused the recession by encouraging people to buy at over-inflated prices and obtaining crazy mortgages. Some people are just going to say things like this to put you on the defensive.
I had a buyer recently go around me. He managed to work his way around the listing agent as well. He called the listing agent and asked for the owner's name and phone number because he just wanted to "rent" the home. The listing agent gave it to him!!! Now, we know this happens from time to time, and I can be a big girl about it. But the worst part about this one....he bought a home just down the street from my own personal home!! I have to drive by him every day...standing in his driveway smoking! I've never acknowledged him, but trust me....I'd really like to flip him the bird!!!
It's everywhere. You can see it in the Internet forums. People are rude and they hide behind fake pictures and made up names. When it comes to money, greed runs deep. I think we have an overwhelming amount of dishonesty. We may be reaching new lows in our collective behavior. What's with that?
Disrespect or just an easy way out? Some customers don't know how or just can't say "no" to salespeople - - that's why all the unanswered and non-returned phone calls and weak excuses when you do catch up with them. Often, they are just trying not to hurt your feelings. I don't let that get to me. I don't waste my time; I know I can help people who want the help - - I move on! What really burns me is when I am disrespected by a fellow real estate professional - - let me count the ways!
I honestly believe that some of the public doesn't understand or doesn't want to understand how we get paid, especially novice homebuyers. There's nothing wrong with a candid discussion about how real estate practitioners earn their money. A lot of customers are genuinely surprised that we don't get paid an hourly rate in addition to our commission. Some have no clue that we don't earn one red cent until a transaction is over.
It is terrible to do a lot of work for some of the jerks out there who have no couth and think they can save a buck by screwing over others, when they are perfectly aware that real estate agents are paid only and if a property closes. Disrespect stinks!
What a sloppy Bears game, fumbles, overthrows, confused defense.-- Now us Bears fans will have to watch Minn run away wih the division. Oh well..in sports and real estate you need a good attitude.
Thank you for writing this. This is so true, Real Estate Agents are very much disrespected and maybe there are times some undeserving ones in the bunch, but as a whole the agents I know and deal with are very professional and concientious. Yes, it is about the $$, but then that is how we make our living and we do put a lot of time and effort into working with client upfront for no pay to get the deal through. The compensation doesn't come weeks later, sometimes month later with short sales. It is all in educating the client who you are working for and how you will get compensated. Why buyers and seller think they can get a better deal by not compensating the agent is beyond me, but respect is number one on the list.
Some people are just jerks. There seem to be more of them walking around than there used to be, or maybe I just notice them more.
Early in my career I had a buyer client who would yell at me whenever I had to tell her something she didn't want to hear. When the sale finally closed (it was a bank-owned property -- what fun) I was never so glad to see the back of anybody in my life. She followed up by responding to my broker's survey by calling me impatient, unprofessional and accusing me of delaying the closing three times (actually she delayed it twice and the bank delayed it once -- I didn't even get a vote).
Oh well. I got paid. I wish her many happy years in her house but I don't ever want to see her again.
Next!
I forget who but someone once said "Resentment is like drinking poison and waiting for the other person to die"
To me, this kind of thing isn't worth the energy of being indignant and angry. We call it disrespect, the buyer calls it "bargain hunting".
When this happens to me, I go have a Dairy Queen, take a deep breath, and forget about it. C'est la vie.
Great post,
For me I try to limit this happening by having personal policies
that I try to adhere to but I think it comes with the territory that disrespect occurs.
If we are prospecting at a high level then when dissapointments occur they will be quickly forgotten.
I follow the Golden Rule and expect it from others. Life's toooo short...If I can't be respected for my profession and personal being after giving my best effort....I walk away.....someone else can take the brunt.
Listings are a dime a dozen right now. And serious buyers, for the most part, respect what I do for them.
It's happened so much in my close to 20 years of selling real estate that I'm cynical about every buyer that I come in contact with. Sadly, I think everyone is out to rob me of my time and commissions. Is there are group for this?
There are people out there who respect and appreciate what we do. I believe that the people who disrespect Real Estate agents disrespect anyone and everyone they can, only thinking of themselves. It comes from thinking that they are "entitled". Now who ever gave them that impression should be held accountable...spoiled children become spoiled adults and children who respect others become respectful adults. Please raise accordingly.
Buyers, being human beings, come in all shapes and sizes. I have come across some of these as both buyers and sellers. Since I wouldn't do something like that to someone and I try to live by the "Golden Rule", it takes me by surprise each time. I just remember what my mentor said when I first got into this business - when you come across someone like this, just say "Next!". You can't change them and they would probably bad mouth you after the deal had you continued to work with them, so you're better off just going on to the next one and letting it go.
Have I, a sales person of 25 years, ever been disrespected? Does a bear poop in the woods??? If you have been in sales and NOT had this happen, I want to hear from you. But the issue here is that sales people usually just go into their corners and cry and feel sorry for themselves. How many go to the client and just ask simply, what happened that made them feel they needed to act that way?
A couple of months ago a client avoided my calls and wasn't telling me what was going on. I had told the client what I thought was the truth and they didn't even give me the courtesy to tell me they had made loan application with another company. The agent was very embarrassed and told me the truth. I was livid. They had LIED to me. But, on the advice of my husband, who is also my business partner, I wrote an e-mail and told the client I understood they were doing their loan with someone else. I wished them well ( while I was still fuming, I wrote this e-mail ) and said that just in case they ran into any issues, please feel free to call me with any questions they had. I copied the agent and he called me to say it was one of the classiest things he had ever seen. About a week later we got a call from the agent who said that the deal was going south, did I want to be a hero? Quicken loans couldn't do what they promised. The agent asked her if she would let us take a look at it. Because of my friendly letter, she was happy to have us look into it. Turns out, I was WRONG about the amount they could qualify for, and they went with Quicken because they really wanted the house and I had questioned whether they could qualify for that much. At the closing my husband asked what we did that made them go elsewhere. We got valuable feedback and realized that had we been in their shoes we probably would have done the same thing. In the end, we made good money, closed a VA loan in record time, and got our agent paid, which resulted in future business. If I had just felt sorry for myself, we would have lost several thousand, our agent would have had a sour taste in his mouth, and I would have lost a valuable lesson.
The long and the short of it is, most clients want to tell you the truth. You just have to make them comfortable to do it. If a client doesn't call me back, I leave a message that says, "Please just let me know if you have decided to work with someone else. If so, that's okay, I don't want to keep bothering you. But if you still need my help, I want to be here for you." I have gotten a lot of calls back from people going BOTH ways. But that way, people know I'm going to be reasonable and here to help.
I am from a small town and disrespect is everywhere! Just a general lack of courtesy from almost everyone, even co-workers. It is truly a shame.
I wrote a blog not very long ago about "buyer loyalty"....there is NONE anymore...thats why we first meet at the office, we discuss what I will do for them, etc...they sign an Exclusive Right agreement then we began to work....I recently had our company attorney settle a case out of court where the same thing happened to me as happened to Pamela...A suit was threatened so she decided it was in her best interest to pay 3/4 of what we agreed to....we are getting paid a lump sum then installments for the balance but it is better than getting zero. We need to start protecting our profession...I dont know of any attorney that will not get a client to sign an employment agreement....that is what I like to call them!
Dean,
They say perception is everything-- no, Service is Everything! I will continue to do the best I can regardless of what the client does- that's the only way, that at the end of the day, I can deal with issues like the ones described above. Did I do the best I could? If so,I let it go- it's on them, and what comes around....
I'm a Packers fan, and there's always been a "thing" between Bears and Packers fans- total strangers, arguing over their teams on who's better than who, often in disrespect and strong verbal language used.
It's not about football, it's about Pride- and pride is what gets in the way in everything.So when I see someone with a Bears jersey, jacket, or hat, i say to myself, "now there goes a very good person who loves a very bad team"!
I feel better now.....
Phoenix, AZ
Had an experience recently where buyers left me wondering..."What the heck happened?" After numerous showings, discussions, requests for information, etc. the Buyer calls to say he's going a "different route". Thinking he meant property, I waited for him to share his thoughts. After some prolonged silence, I finally asked, "OK, what would that be?" He informed me that he would not need my services. Needless to say I was truly surprised, trying to pick up my jaw from the floor. Up to this point, the relationship had been going well with a return visit scheduled to view another property I had found for them. His voice betrayed his reluctance to explain why he was making this decision and I agonized for several days trying to think what I had done wrong. In the end, I decided I did nothing wrong and was dealing with someone who did not share a respect for my services.
Dean...I sympathize with you, I'm a Lions fan!
Mark Bear
Anyone who has been in this business for a while has been scorned.
The agent you mentioned who was paid by the developer was lucky to have worked with such an honest developer; although the developer knew it was probably cheaper to pay them than go through a lawsuit for a commission. Here's a good question--Do we as Realtors know what happens to the sign-in sheet or card once we leave the model homes? Do we have a copy, or do we just rely on faith?
What happens is that people think they can get a good deal, leaving out the Realtor. It's kind of like a FSBO: Does a FSBO buyer believe they are getting a good deal because there is no commissions to be paid? A FSBO seller does not do it alone to save the buyer money--they do it to save themselves money!
The idea of "Buyers are liars" is a misnomer in our industry... I've heard agents say this over and over. Sometimes it just appears this way; and example being a person wants a 3/2, no pool, 2 car garage. They end up buying a 4/2, with a pool and a 3 car garage. Why? Because it fit their needs. They fell in love with that house. They did not lie. Some agents I've heard consider this lying. It is not. They just did not know what they truly wanted, which is why they employed our services.
Loyalty is what I like... It is not a matter of disrespect, I feel. Anybody who has been in this business for a while knows that when we are dealing with strangers, we will on occassion get kicked in the teeth-it happens. Experience teaches us to get rid of these people ASAP. When we give something away for free, such as our services, it is bound to happen. Just spin off those clients, and move on, otherwise one will go crazy. It happens a lot in our business, and those that don't get over it, leave. That is fine with me. The field is too crowded anyway, although the Dept. of Justice seems to believe there is not enough competition...
I had a similar experience with the daughter of a real estate broker! The out-of -town broker called in the referral for his daghter and son-in-law who were transferring to the area. I might add that the son-in-law was taking over the regional Homeland Security office. After 2 weeks of schlepping them around, we found a FSBO that excited them. I got the seller to sign a commission agreement, then showed the property. The next thing I knew, my buyer client was not going to buy, as the pending sale of their existing home had fallen apart. (A lie.) Less than 30 days later, they closed on the FSBO property. Both Buyer and Seller lied to me -- even after committing on paper that they would honor our agreements.
Did it leave a bad taste in my mouth? YOU BET IT DID! Should they all be publicly humiliated and dragged through the streets announcing their crime? Of course they should, but, alas, that will not happen --- and they know that.
Over the years I have learned that whenever expedient in their eyes, people of presumably good character, will abuse truth and honorable behavior to gain what they believe is some advantage. It always irritates me. I hope it always irritates me, because, the day that it ceases to bother me is the day that I have given up my own principles.
Interesting stuff. What I try to remember is that respect should go both ways. And, that if people who I have NO respect for don't respect me...well there's no love lost and that doesn't bother me. I want to be respected by people who matter. The others I'd rather leave me alone.
Sometimes the lesson is well worth what it cost in time and/or money. There are several I will never do business with now. I'll be nice, and I'll introduce them to someone who holds the same type of standards they hold...then they can con each other all day and I can get on with my life. My first month in real estate I joked that I had started a "s*ithead" list. It might not be such a bad idea.
You all are using a much kinder word-disrespect-- for what really this all is to me--- BETRAYAL.... defined as: To be false or disloyal to; To lead astray; deceive. Clients are disrespectful when they show up 20 minutes late for their appointment.....but to me when someone consciously uses me and my time (after I have explained to them how this Real Estate system works and ask them to make sure they are not working with another Realtor) and them dumps me and leaves me without a commission--that is and feels like betrayal. And that hurts even though "I know" I am not supposed to take it personally because it isn't---gotta go...for now..
Living close to Philadelphia, I have absorbed the ability to detect what they call an "atty-tood." If prospective buyers or sellers approach me with one of these, my brain says to me, "Next!". It's a waste of time to work with some of these people, because if they think you are not honest, they are just reflecting what they would do in your circumstance.
This happens on a regular basis and if stuff like this didn't happen to me at least once a week I would wonder if my @$$hole radar dectector is still in working order.
The most recent of note is an agent referral where they buyer would just "pop" into town and expect me to drop everything for him. I kept firing him and the agent kept saying he wasn't going behind my back. He was using me for comps and opinions. I finally gave up after running 40 pages of comprehensive (rental and resale) comps for 2 hours for him.
Next time I have this hunch with a referral, they are so outta there immediately. I don't put up with BS from people who just blindly contact me so I don't know why I put up with them for two months.
This is an excellent post. I've always found it ironic that those in the general public are free to act in any particular fashion, while expecting an entirely different set of principles from those they deal with. And it's also true there are a LOT of shady participants in our business. However, one doesn't excuse the other.
In the old days ('cause let's face it, I'm old), I would let clients like you mentioned really bother me. However, over the years, I look at it differently. Knowing that I do take pride in being a professional, I know those kind of clients are more than likely going to end up with that same shady agent and/or mortgage rep they tend to deserve. The old adage of "What goes around, comes around" is never better served than in these instances. I've seen it happen many, many times.
Disrespect, how about when it is from other professionals? EX. Attorneys at the closing table? This happened to a co-worker who went to a closing and the attorney made mention of the Realtor always showing up first, well dressed, and ahead of everyone to collect the BIG check. I was livid when I heard this, first off, let's see, the BIG check belongs to the brokerage firm we work for, and does the attorney know how long we have spent w/that buyer or seller? So, I guess I don't just let it go, even when it is not directed at me! Disrespect from clients I think I am finally starting to get used to. People are still very leery of real estate agents, as they say we are compared to the used car salesman. Personally, I surround myself with stand up people so I don't have the trust issues I am finding clients have and my car salesman is great too, I trust him and refer people to him all of the time! :)
I like the idea I've heard a few times, of getting a retainer fee from buyers. If they buy, it goes back to them 100%. If they don't buy, I was paid for my time. But I'm aware most buyers would just move on to someone who doesn't charge the retainer fee.
Dean...As Ronald Reagan said long ago....Trust but verify.
Jerry Gray CRB,CRS,GRI / Prudential Carolinas Realty / Winston Salem, NC
in the case of someone buying through the builder - I'd send them a card to congratulate them on their new home purchase, and for allowing me to sign them in. Heck, i'd probably knock on their door with a small house-warming gift.
Yes things like that have happened to me and to my agents in my 24 years. When I first internview an agent I ask them how they react to getting blamed for something they did not do. This tells me how they will react to your situation (how they react to a Bears loss is another thing).
I always look at is there something I could have done differently, if there is I remind myself to do that in the future and to share it with others. If there is not, I push myself to move past it (this takes being brutily honest with yourself) and let it go.
Now if I can just figure out a way to get over the Bears loosing last night!
There are unethical people in all professions, which includes buyers and sellers too! I've actually had unethical sellers and unethical buyers work with an unethical agent to cut a better deal by lowering the commission. It was my listing, I introduced the buyer, and the agent was from the office I was with in those days. The broker was unknowingly a dual agent and things really got complicated. I've moved on but I will never forget and I'm still a trusting agent.
For a moment I thought you were talking about mortgage and real estate agents, good thing there's professionals in our industry .....
Funny this topic should come up when just yesterday I was reading our local paper and lo and behold, there were TWO buyers I worked with in the "Recently Sold in York County" section who had:
1. Purchased something both parties SWORE they never wanted.
2. Bought directly through a builder.
ARGH! Now, in the old days (read that, when I was a newbie), I would have been devastated. It's not as if I didn't keep in contact with these buyers via emailing listings and mailing cards, etc....for years, mind you!
However, now that I've got 10 years of slights, insults, lies and just plain foolishness under my belt (along with many more delightful clients and transactions), I just shake my head and say, "Oh well". I won't lie. These situations really do irk me, but one thing I have learned in real estate is that you can't win 'em all, no matter what you do. People get excited about something and blammo, off they go at the drop of a hat to buy off of either someone else or direct from a builder. They DO forget about us, much as we would love to believe we are unforgettable! And yes, sometimes I want to play dumb and give them a ring, but it just isn't worth the energy. In my case here, both buyers purchased a product that I would not recommend and I have no interest in potential resale of it later down the road.
Here is an even worse example of disrespect: Imagine the selling agent standing up at the end of the closing and telling YOUR buyers, "Hey, whenever you are ready to sell, give me a call; I know the area very well." I went through this one recently. Rather than get angry, I just file these things away under "What Goes Around, Comes Around". Funny, the older I get, the more I get to see the results!
Onwards and upwards!
I learned early on in this business, You better be a team player!
I find it hard to forget those who were not.
It is an interesting business where we work together with our competition to get to the goal. Happy buyer and happy seller. It's very nice when two agents are happy too.
I have only been in the business for 4 years and I have noticed that most of the disrespect has been from "some" of my colleagues.
In fact my very first clients were meeting me at a home and another agent was having an open house that I was not aware of and they got there before me so she showed them the house. When I got there she kept the clients in the house and came out screaming at me about procuring cause. I was to new to do anything about it then.
Now I educate my buyers. I let them know that I do not work for free before I show them property. Most are respectful to that fact and once they understand have been loyal. I find, for the most part the public just doesn't understand how agency works.
This can be a hard business if you are working with strangers. I don't do floor duty because I don't want to work with people who don't know me as the trust will not be there. If someone calls or e-mails me who I don't know, I take the time to get to know them. I have a form with me by the phone to take down all their contact info, but I don't jump right to that. I engage them in conversation and get to know them and let them get to know me. I may take a couple of phone conversations before we build a level of comfort and trust to the point where they are willing to sign an exclusive buyer's agreement at our first meeting. It doesn't always progress to that point, of course, but you have to be willing to let go of some opportunities in order to embrace others. I've experienced some disrespect from clients and other professionals over the course of my career, but most of it was in the early days when I would jump at every opportunity rather than first qualify my clients. and build a relationship with them. This is a business based on trust and when that falters between oneself and clients or with other professionals, the failure rate of completed transactions becomes much higher and this business becomes very stressful and less productive.
Dean, first congrats on the featured post!
Have the buyer sign a Buyer's Agency Agreement. Don't leave home without it! The consumer thinks we have a regular paycheck coming in like most of those who are not unemployed her in America. Most do not understand relationships because they haven't been taught. Some don't care. Bottom, you've learned just like you shared with me on Friday night - "Get all the paperwork Barbara, or you don't move forward!"
You're my hero!
P.S. Bring Buddie into the office, soon!
I call it getting in between a person and a dollar bill. It reflects badly on them. But it's theft, just like shoplifting, and payment should be diligently pursued. Colorado listings have a holdover clause that would have covered the FSBO agreement. My attorney suggested I make it 180 days.
One of my agents worked with Ms, who said Mr wasn't going to be on title. Ms fired us and Mr made an offer. The idea was the listing agent would reduce commission and rebate the buyer. The listing broker was prepared to pay our commission, but it didn't close. Awww...
Yes, it is easy to see where one can be offended by the buyer actions. Donna, I really like your comment about 'make a difference' to really affirm the value you can bring into a transaction.
However....how many of you have gone to the brick and mortar store to get a demonstration of a product. To get the feel for a product, the weight of the product in your hand and then buy from Walmart or on-line. Yes, you did save money...a little...at a great cost to your integrity. Yes, I know times are tough for everyone.
The opportuntiy to save 6, 8, 10, 12 thousand dollars and emerge victorious over those greedy realtors is irresistable to those whose excuse for all action is 'does it help me?" It's a byproduct of a society that has decided holding people accountable for their actions is not important. Even worse, we tend to bestow some measure of respect to those who vanquish their perceived adversaries. It is shameful that the few lacking integrity can poison the environment in which we all live.
Take upon yourselves the call to encourage those who toil with you to stay focused on the difference they can make in the lives of others, the great opportunity you have to present new beginnings to those caught in the bind of lifes changes and contuinously nurture the self esteem of your collegues with the unwaivering commitment to live above the confusion caused by misguided souls.
Thanks~after 20 years in this business, I have learned to just go ahead, pick up the phone or "stop by" and ask people (in a nice, slow, southern...manner) why they would do this? Then I ask them if they were planning on not using my services..why didnt they tell me before I took time away from friends and family. If they "act" like they feel bad...ask for a referral but tell them you hope their referral will be considerate!! Ha ha.
Most people will not believe you will have the nerve to call them,~~ plus this will show a client what a tough negotiator you are and that they missed out on an agressive agent helping them with their purchaser....call them on it!!!!:)
Susan
Murphy's Law...When dealing with people you will experience disrespect and dishonesty at sometime from someone.
With dis-belief and disappointment, through the years my response is "What is The Lesson in This". I've learned to be more aware and selective of who I work with...using my intuition some psychology... asking questions and to spelling out values and expectations. No perfect solutions...I feel that I'm a better person and thankful that there are more honorable customers than not.
- May God grant me the serenity to accept things that I can not change, the courage to change things that I can and the wisdom to know the difference.
Learning the hard way to weed out unqualified prospects. Attitude as well as financial. If you start off defending yourself, probably not a good investment of your time.satin-leaf
Get a buyer-broker agreement signed upfront.
It seems liek most lawyers I know joke about the blackeye their profession has. I hate to think we would be seen in the same light. Hmm, maybe I should invest in plaid sport coats?
Jeff Burnham, Rosen & Co. Las Vegas, NV
I think agents and loan officers in my area have lost a lot of respect because so many of them pushed a lot of people to purchase during 2008 to buy. In 2008 we lost about 70% of our home values. Literally ,each month the home would lose $10,000 to $30,000 yet everyone was running around telling buyers this was the best time to buy.
There is the "disrespect" syndrome with both buyers & sellers and it happens to the best of Realtors. It would be easier to respond to someone that is disrespectful in kind.
I recently received a terse email from a client that disturbed me immensely. I did what I usually do when there is controversy brewing...I slept on it. Having thought about it during the night, the next morning I knew how I would respond. Regardless of the situation or circumstances when others are disrespectful, I try to respond with what my mother taught me - Good Manners!
Last, just to make myself feel better, I make it a point to forgive the idiot . Works for me! Enjoy the day!
Courtney Peace Hagins ABR CDPE RE/MAX Island Realty Hilton Head Island, SC
Anyone who has been in real estate very long, has had this happen to them. Let's all keep this in mind when we are out price shopping and bargain hunting! We can all boo-hoo and say poor me, but how many times have we went to a small local department store and received good information about a product from a knowledgable member of the staff and then went online or to a big discount store to buy the product cheaper. Aren't we doing the same thing? I have found the more I stay loyal to my sphere in buying products, whether it's my local music store, local hardware store, local mechanic, local car dealership the more loyalty I receive from those people and their referrals. It makes sense, so before we get down on everyone for being greedy, let's make sure our own behaviors are in check. If we know we are doing our best to be loyal customers to our service providers in all arenas of our life, then it becomes easier to "NEXT' those few bad apples.
Dean,
Cutler was erratic. Maybe you will get Favre at his next resurrection.
Some people have no integrity. We ask a lot of probing questions and will make a judgement call to go further based on your gut feeling. Sometimes you win and sometimes you lose.
Thank you, as a rookie I was feeling especially victimized.
I have decided to remind people upfront that I am investing time and money in THEM.
Maybe this will make them feel less entitled to lie about having a pre-approval from a lender.
"Ya, ya I have a pre-approval"
I ran into a client I had been showing homes to for sometime and then they disappeared. They had gone into an open house and the Listing Agent told them they had to work with him to get the home. I did not have a buyer Broker agreement. I let it go.
I got a similar situation going on now (I suspect). I have a buyer-broker agreement. I am check the tax info for their uncommon name to show up. Then I am going to have my broker approach the other broker and see what we can do about getting paid.
My dad always told me courtesy pays. As a matter of fact "Courtesy Pays" was the motto on his letterhead. And guess what, it does.
Tell Pamela to send them a nice note congratulating them on the settlement of their new home.
She might also enclose a copy of her commission check. "Courtesy Pays" but revenge is sweet! No No don't do that. That was my evil twin who wrote that.
Pay no attention to Jack. Do it anyway!
Hi Dean, Born in Highland Park Illinois!! Residing in San Diego for the last 35 years. I've had only 3 that can be mentioned. You give your heart and soul becuase you love what you do. You trust and want to help people. My first left me so heartbroken, second didn't sting as much after the 3rd one I had to let go. Now if that happens I just say NEXT! Move on, don't take it personal. Some buyers and sellers just go where they think the "gra$$" is greener. So all in all I have been blessed with my clients and have more passion for this business than when I started.
What happened to Pamela is something that can burn out a new person in the business and I guess, others as well.
Regardless of buyer agency AND asking the right questions still does not protect you. What works the best for me now is if a buyer or seller does not jump through enough 'hoops' for me, I refer them or fire them!
I also if I can, tell them why! Amazingly, some have turned around and became great clients! If you market poperly you will have lots of buyers or sellers where you can pick with whom you wish to work with.
Ty
Great post & discussion. I liked Carole's point #47 above. It is important that we agents show mutual respect. I had a similar incident where a Buyer agent solicited my well connected Seller for future referrals right in front of me at closing. That kind of nonsense gives us agents a bad name.
I have a client right now that is one for the books. Nasty, petulent, immature and generally never stops complaining. But at least they are closing. What's really tough is a client you walk through fire for - who the wriggles out at the last minute or does an end-run around you.
As to the former - nasty, petulent - I have little tolerance. I did for a while, but this person had all the maturity of a 10-year old - and I think I should really stop insulting 10-year-olds! The client complained to my broker - who after 10 minutes of talking to them realized what I was dealing with.
When considering the latter...those who do end-runs around agents. I think that the only solution is the EBA for buyers and a retainer for time and marketing expenses. I would gladly offer a slightly reduced commission for KNOWING that I was going to be compensated. The difficulty is that most would prefer to play with the "house" money and not their own. However, part of the respect issue is that we have given away far too much for free. When you give stuff away - it loses its value. The internet has not helped either. A little knowledge is a dangerous thing. All too many clients think they know it ALL because of sites like Zillow. They don't they have numbers which are probably very inaccurate as well as information that might well be misinformation. Yet the feel "empowered."
Thank you for the post and to all that have contributed interesting stories about being in the same situation. We live in an age where manners and loyalty are becoming a rare commodity. If you set the bar of expectation too high or too low you're bound to have a resentment sure enough. Live the life you want others to live and realize that you too will not always meet someone's expectation nor they meet yours. Be forgiving about those who disrespect you as what they think of you is none of your business. What you think of yourself and how you conduct yourself is your business. Those that choose to be desceitful are always going to come into contact with us. Live through it. That said it still hurts when you have put in a lot of work for nothing.
Yes, I've been disrespected many times. I'm a Realtor and Buyer's Agent in Miami and I have had customers tell me that they lost a house because of me. Other buyers just stopped answering my calls after months of working with them, probably since they had already offered or closed on another house.
But my most memorable disrespecting moment had to be a buyer that went behind my back and tried to purchase the same condo with 2 other agents after I had worked out a deal for him with the Owner/agent.
When my broker confronted him, he of course blamed his behavior on me. That's what I notice, some unscrupulous buyers will always use you as a scapegoat.
So, if anything, I've learned in Real Estate and now in Life that even if someone wants to make you feel bad about yourself, you can just smile and realize they are not perfect either and it's not always your fault.
Real Estate is a tough game and you got to roll with the punches!
And the end of the story, that buyer never did get that condo. Because the Owner/Agent respected me and told me about him. He tried to get it $2,000 less than what I had negotiated for. I had already gotten a $32,000 discount for him, but he didn't follow through. When the owner/agent realized the buyer was trying to buy his property with another agent he contacted me immediately. The owner agent accepted another offer that was only $10,000 from his asking.
I was thrilled. Good guys sometimes do win!!!
Dean,
Pamela here. Just kidding. But read on.
I love Ty's post on this, as well as your original post. Someday I will get to where Ty is on this.
A guy I'll call Fritz was referred to me by his brother, my client. Fritz called his best friend, an agent, and called me on the same day. He thought it would be better to have us both working on a deal for him! I was gathering information on a property for him, and the bank rep told me there was already another offer for the property. Fritz didn't want to sign a buyer's rep agreement with me, and soon admitted that he had lied to me...the "other offer" was his, submitted by his friend.
Not much I could have done, I suppose. In this business, you have to be able to rebound from disappointments, and stay positive and professional. Bitterness isn't very attractive, but graciousness is.
Yes it happens. For me, I get initially upset and review in my mind where it might have gone wrong. I know I give it my all and once the initial disappointment passes, I recognize it says way more about them than it does me and I move on. The worst thing we can do to ourselves is to keep dealing with people like that once we recognize the telltale signs. They drain the life out of you and keep other good things from coming into your life.
Yeah!! Real Estate is not for the faint of heart!! I was working with seller's, and shopping for their new home..great clients!! After showing several properties they told me they where going to rent for 6 months... wanted to take time no rush....(RED FLAG). They went to an open house one weekend and stroked a deal with the listing agent... agent gave him $2,000 at close of escrow. They moved into the new place a week after we closed escrow on his house. (when I asked for their new address, they made the confession) They didn't want to hurt my feelings...IMAGINE that!!! Very painful, specially when he complemented what a great job I did selling his house, for TOP $$$!!! I have learned my lesson. No buyer agent agreement, no client!!! Great post!! Thank you
Oh now see what you did... and I was just starting to get over this.
About 10-12 years ago my Daughter and Son-in-law were looking for a new home in the next county over about 40 miles away. I must have told them 10 times not to give their information to any new home builders. That if they saw a home they were really interested in, I was only a phone call away. Well, they found one and told the sales lady that "my Mom is a Realtor and I need to call her". The lady said well these homes are going fast and by the time she could get here this one will probably be gone.
My Daughter called when they got home to tell me the good news. I almost fainted. She tried to calm me down by saying that she gave the sales lady my card and was assured that she would pay me the 3% commission. That promise wasn't very calming. The sales lady was suppose to call me in a couple of days. When she didn't I called her.
The sales lady went on to assure me that she new I was a Realtor and the clients Mom and there wasn't going to be any problem. That a close of escrow a commission check would be sent to my broker. I asked her if I needed to sign anything and if I could get a copy of something showing the commission. She said something avoiding my question and I was scared. I was about to lose my own house and needed the money desperately.
Guess what happened at close of escrow? You're right. I didn't get a dime. When I called she said "You must be kidding. You know the rules and you weren't here when they registered. We never intended on sending you a commission." Then she hung up.
I was in such direr straights. I couldn't believe this was happening with my own Daughters home purchase. I went to bed and stayed there for a couple of days.
Lesson learned. Don't believe what any sales person tells you. You must have it in writing.
Oh, I was so hoping the post would be about some of our fellow agents that are disrespectful, lie to buyers and try to do things that are not in both sides best interest.
Buyers that aren't loyal are easy to deal with. NEXT! It's not worth my time. When I was a new agent I could use them to learn on. But I spend quite a bit of time with my buyers and sellers. If I wouldn't want to have dinner with them at the end of a transaction, I don't keep them as clients. My broker laughs at me. I'll be in his office trying to work something out and I'll tell him how nice these people are, his reply is that I only work with nice people. But it's true. Everyone is difficult in some way, but if we can't be honest with each other and trust each other, I can't help someone.
So does anyone have any ideas on how to deal with agents that aren't respectful while the transaction is going on?
Thanks, Karen @ HamlitonLandon GMAC in Apple Valley
If you work with enough people something like this is going to happen to you. I don't know a successful realtor that does not have a knife in their back. We MUST, at those times, remember ALL fo the wonderful people that we have dealt with and are dealing with and be grateful for them. No one is immune from running into people who may, at some time, do something questionable. Attempting to give everyone a little grace is a healing activity. This calls to mind the end of Desiderata " With all it's Sham, drudgery and broken dreams it's still a beautiful world. Be cheerful. Strive to be happy"
Dean,
Seems like we all have the same story in one form or another. I try to educate buyers up front, but that doesn't always work because some people are just users and abusers!
Although all bets are off in resale w/o a buyers rep agreement, it's IMPERATIVE to do a buyers registration card with builders. I was a broker in Las Vegas before and during that monumental housing boom and new homes were flying off the shelves. People don't need their agent to "show up" at a sales office but most builders will allow you to register your buyers by phone. I had two instances where buyers bought new homes and tried to end run me with their relative or best friend but I got paid.
Part of the perception problem with the public is with so much info available via the internet, they don't understand the value we bring to the table. I personally make sure any potential client has a rather detailed report outlining everything that transpires in a transaction from viewing, to negotiating, to scheduling through the closing. Almost to a peron their reaction is "really? We had no idea it was that involved!"
From that point, getting a signature on a buyers rep agreement gets pretty easy. Nobody gets in the car without the agreement and a pre-qual. We have to gauard the castle!!
It just comes with the territory, Dean. Hard to swallow at times. But when things like this happen, just say "This, too will pass". And it will.
Steve
Facing the selfishness and "me-ness" of others is certainly present in any business, but it is also prevelent in everyday life. If I take it on myself to feel that disrespect means someone is challenging my value; I certainly will feel hurt and one of my reactions will be to look for retribution. Simply believing that I am a person of value, and I don't need someone else to validate me is a first step. The second step is this; as a person of value I deserve to be compensated for the value I have contracted to provide. So take your money, keep your self-esteem and wish that other person luck as they try to take their value from you and not from within themselves.
To those that have posted that the agents swindling the buyers away were to give or had given the buyer money at closing....is that not illegal in your state? It certainly is here. Part of our agent licensing law disallows rebating money to the buyer.
Might take a look into that. Not that it's a great 'sour grapes' response on our parts, but it's at the very least, highly unethical to snag buyers away from another in such a cheap and tawdry manner. ;)
IT IS RAMPANT and it is a PROBLEM. A BIG ONE. and in my opinion it starts with the Internet and the wide distribution of the MLS data to 3rd parties. People dont think they NEED realtors because they are empowered by all the information (homes, prices and addresses)
EVERYONE wants to SAVE a BUCK, and think they do better without a buyers agent. They dont seem to understand we EARN our money. REALTORS are a problem too. WE GIVE AWAY TOO MUCH FOR FREE. When we freely provide information on everything they want to know....why do they need us? Recently a potential listing client was very impressed with my responsiveness, the quality of the CMA I delivered, When I followed up next, She thanked me for my quality report, but shopped the listing fee. I know we cant "fix" fee's, but please folks, lets not put ourselves out of business. THE INTERNET and the leads we get from the internet are IMPERSONAL, they dont care,
WE PAY for SEO and our lead boxes are FILLED with fake names and bad phone numbers. They use temporary email addresses and delete them. they UNSUBSCRIBE the first or 2nd time you make contact by the email address they leave.
I THINK WE SHOULD ALL GO ON RETAINERS....doesnt have to be a lot. even just $250.00 AND an agency agreement is ALWAYS in order. IF WE DO NOT ASSIGN A VALUE TO OUR SERVICES, how will they come to VALUE us. THEY HAVE NO SKIN in the GAME. They behave as if they are buying shoes at k-mart and will go to wall mart to price check.
Then we have an industry wide issue. There needs to be higher barriers to entry. Our brokers hire new agents who only want to save on commissions for their own personal transactions. Rather than support the professionals who want to make a career of real estate.
grrrrrh...not only are we dispected by the public, but our industry, and industry providerswho want to fleece our pockets with tools and services "we cant live without" with one year contracts that dont deliver what they "promise".
I think we've all had buyers that we've spent time, energy, and money with only to find out they went behind our backs, or decided not to go through with a purchase. It's unfortunatley a risk we take being paid on commission in a business where a lot of work leads up to a closing. It didn;t take me long to figure out that I didn;t want this happening to me. Partly for this reason, I spend more time with the client upfront, in the office, on the phone, etc. This gives me and opportunty to demonstrate my value to the buyer as well as to explain the way things work and to understand the motivations of the buyer. I always use a buyer agency agreement and I've found that by taking the extra time in the beginning to educate the buyer greatly reduces my time wasted with uncommitted buyers. We've all got much better ways to waste our time.
Dean,
I'm not a "dweller"! My buzz word is "NEXT" and I move on. ( However, I do have some nasty words zooming thru my mind!LOL)
Kathy Opatka
Using a BB agreement doesn't help Pamela from the sting in which the buyer tells the developer not to pay her. Why didn't the developer say nothing to the buyer and just contact you to tell you what the situation was? I'm sure it's happened to them before and will happen again. Who's going to bring in more business, the trash talking buyer or your team at KW?
In business, as in life, people will always do what they feel is "best" for them. You gotta roll with the punches, and unfaithful buyers is just one of them in the Real Estate business.
What goes around comes around I always say, so, Pamela, your buyers will get what's coming to them one day. I'm glad that you got paid.
Thanks Dean.
I am sure this has happened to all of us, and yes it's a real bummer to say the least! But I do subscribe to those thoughts of "moving on" or NEXT. I also agree that it's not always easy to let go, especially when you have done everything right, including listening to them and continuing to bond with them along the way.
S@#T happens?
NEXT!
Thanks for the great post!
Happens in all professions. Doctors complain that their patients don't give them all the facts so they can get some type of treatment they otherwise would not get. Hairdressers say the client said "An inch off the top please" and then complain it's too short.
People can be fickle, greedy or just plain misinformed or lack communication skills.
As professionals, we have to deal with it as it comes, and not take anything personally.
It's hard to develop a thick skin without becoming negative, but that's the only way to survive in ANY business that deals with the public (or friends and relatives!).
From the general public and the press I expect a certain amount of disrespect; when it comes from another agent then it gets personal. If we can't respect each other, why expect anyone from outside the Real Estate profession to give us the same courtesy.
I wrote a post a few years ago about a young girl trying to take advantage of my time without letting me know about her buying situation. She ended up calling me every name in the book because I wanted to know how she was going to buy the home. She told me not to worry about it. That was the last flag, and after she started cussing at me, I told her that she needed to find another agent because I wasn't going to work with her.
Buyers are't always truthful with you. THey do sneak around. Not all though, I've had some great clients who are now friends. But there are a few bad apples out there.
I know this happens in all lines of business-but we need to focus on the positive. Perhaps there is something we can do differently? Would you really want the client that did not want to list with you? I prefer to not dwell on the 'disrespect' issue. Things do happen. I want clients that feel comfortable with my abilities and my expertise. Anyone agree?
Hi Dean,
I think we have these things happen to us as life lessons, which hopefully makes us wiser in the long run. I had a buyer that I met at an open and took out several times to search for homes. He ended up buying something with another agent. I think the worst part is the deception. We were in contract on a purchase of a short sale. We got through the approval stage and the inspections and then he backed out claiming he had changed his mind. When I asked him when he would like to get started looking again he said that he needed some time. I assumed that since his children had started school he might be waiting for them to get through the semester. He was never a great communicator but I could monitor that he was opening the listings and communication that I sent him. Finally after 6 months, he sent me a note telling me that he had bought another house, but would I still keep him on my MLS search. Upon investigating, I found out that he had put an offer on the house he bought when he was still in the contract with me. I thought at first that maybe he went straight through the listing agent but that was not the case either. It was very disappointing but I am also a big believer in karma and know in the end it will all work out.
Thanks for your post!
DeeDee
Interesting discussion. I worked as a paramedic for years before entering real estate and it's amazing. Most people almost instantly show trust and respect for profesionals such as police, firefighter, EMS, etc - even though there are some "bad apples" there too. In the end though, we really are educators and the better we educate our customers and clients (about the service we really provide), hopefully getting "cut out" can be minimized. There will ALWAYS be people in this world though that will believe they are gaining something (or losing something) and when that happens they obviously didn't understand what they gained by working with a real estate professional. Don't you wish these people wore labels :-)
I don't think any of us has passed through this market or any other without being yelled at, called a liar, doubted, left waiting for a client who doesn't show up, find out a client is working with multiple other Realtors, ...well... we all know what they do.
It's sad and I think it's worse now because of the economy. One client I am dealing with now had her Realtor tell her my house was """gone""" when it wasn't. Another was told NOT to look at the community I live in ...Tradition in PSL Fl, because everyone there is OLD. SO FAR from the truth it's sad, notwithstanding the fact that it's NOT TRUE! The other Realtors told down right LIES.
Dealing with the strange and god awful clients are more than enough - It's a full moon or Halloween EVERY DAY, much less dealing with the other agents that make our lives MORE miserable to boot!
I've been in the business for ....hell.. 30 years. I think I have paid my "dues" but they still keep coming up with new ones. I still can't believe what I hear on a DAILY BASIS and what people will do to SAVE (they think) an almighty DOLLAR! I hope they reap what they sow...they deserve it!
Some people are just jerks and truly self-centered. The trick is not to take it personally, which is easier said than done.
Oh boy! I was in the business for 19 years. Ask me if I've run into disrespectful people!
How about the woman who made an appointment for a Sunday morning, so I left my family and went in to the office. When she didn't show up I called her home and a little kid told me she couldn't come to the phone because she was eating her breakfast.
Or the "friends" who had me show them homes every Saturday for 3 months. Then purchased from their landlady. (We didn't have buyer agency in those days.)
Or the woman that had one of my agents drive her all over town for a full day, then asked to borrow his phone so she could call "her agent" and arrange to meet and write and offer on one of the listings he showed her.
Then there was the preacher who wanted to buy the old vacant church building. I showed it to him at least 8 times because he had to have various church people see it. Then he asked my broker if a different agent in the office could have the transaction because that agent had promised to come to their church and I had declined the invitation. (My broker said no way, by the way.)
Those were just the tip of the iceburg!
No, you can't take those things personally. Some humans are just jerks, and that's how it is. All we can do is keep on following our own conscience and ethics and don't worry about them. They're the ones who have to live with themselves.
I could tell several of my own stories, some of which are worse then this. But, I see no reason to dwell on all the negative things a few of my clients have done to me. I would love some more respect.
Dean, This is SO timely as I just blogged on general lack of courtesy the other day. It's completely WRONG to use others, be deceitful, waste another's time, etc. What's so hard about treating the other person like you would want to be treated? Things really need to change and fast!
If you've been in business, any kind of business, it's bound to happen on occasion. Thankfully, more of the clients out there have a conscience and abide by the Golden Rule. What goes around, comes around.
I called a new home development to ask if they cooperated with brokers and they said yes. So I took my clients (in this case my parents) for their first visit, signed them in and filled out a broker request form with my business card attached. While my parents wrote their offer, I asked the developers sales agent what form I needed to sign. He told me at that point that they wouldn't be paying commissions for another 30 days. He made a comment about how he knew I wanted the best for my folks whether or not I got a commission. But, he didn't count on the wrath of my Mom. She was really ticked at the bait and switch and tore the contract up then and there. She made a parting remark - "If you'd lie about that, then I can't believe anything else you told me about this place."
My folks kept looking and found a different community that they like better and cost less. And yes, I got paid a commission on that one. Bad behavior happens, but really is irritating when it comes within our ranks.
Amazing how this topic hit the nerve of so many who responded (and probably to all the others who didn't). Sometimes sales seems to be a thankless job because people can be cruel and self-centered and oftentimes nuts. No one said this was easy. So let's keep on keepin' on and continue to secure those Exclusive Representation Agreements. And find satisfaction in the many clients who really do like and respect us.
Great Post. I get it all too often in this business -- disrespect for my time. It is important that we remember to treat others as we want to be treated
I'm thinking about starting a new service firm. The working name is naming it Kneecaps Realty Services. For $50 I can have one of our associates pay a service call on buyers/sellers who disrespect realtors. We will be accepting major credit cards and will be offering group discounts.
I'm thinking about starting a new service firm. The working name is naming it Kneecaps Realty Services. For $50 I can have one of our associates pay a service call on buyers/sellers who disrespect realtors. We will be accepting major credit cards and will be offering group discounts.
One word...Redfin!
I am not a realtor but I work with several and hear and see the horror stories. I can tell you now that I have pre-approved people for loans, these are people who were introduced to me by a realtor, and they will ask me if I will still work with them if they decide to use a different realtor. When I ask why they would want to switch, it is because they have run across a Redfin realtor on line who has convinced them that they will do the same work and kick back 2% of the purchase price. On a $300k purchase, if you dangle a $6k carrot in front of a buyer, they will often lose their loyalty, especially when they already have the house picked out that they want to make an offer on. Many people have said it, get the agreement signed.
Mark
I know most of you have had this happen to you! Having worked in new home sales from 1996 to June of 2007, then switching over to general real estate - I thought I was really thick skinned negotiating between the builders and the buyers, and during those times, working with buyers that seemed to be loyal, but they were actually shopping about fifty builders. However, since working in general real estate I find disrespect to run rampant, from clients that are even suppose to be from the "old school." I am a very dedicated real estate professional, and I have always gone way beyond the extra mile to work with a client to find them just the right home. Recently, an associate of mine and I had spent about a week taking a couple out that we had worked with sending specific properties for two months prior to their arrival, and jumped through hoops to get them into see some of the properties per the listing realtor had to be present, and this couple had told us that the location we were in was where they wanted to be, and they had narrowed it down to several homes that my associate had shown them. Then bam, the day she was suppose to take them back for a second showing on the ones they liked to go to contract, they had already signed a contract with another agent in another area close by. In one year this has happened twice, and based on what I hear from other real estate professionals it's par for the course. Is this right? As hard as realtors work to take all of the additional training they can at their local board, and not to mention the time and expense involved, for something like this to happen - just isn't right. Anyway, thank goodness there are those that remain loyal no matter what, and that makes our work rewarding . Tally ho, and keep moving forward, onto the next.
I think I'll share this on my personal real estate blog. While it is cathartic to share amongst ourselves our common plight, ....It is the public who needs to understand how their behavior is ugly in our eyes, and counterproductive to their goals.
We are "AGENTS" for them. We are bound to SERVE them, and REPRESENT them, but treat us like a "drive thru".
In this business, if you are doing enough of it, you will get jecked around by buyers and sellers. You have two choices. Look up and investigate the past, look and fight for your lost commission (not) and say buyers are liars and sellers are yellers. OR you can keep moving forward with new deals, showing great vaue, having "Roles and Expectations" conversations including loyalty. And make more deals. Aways forgive them for they do not know what they lost in you: "the best professional around" and a great long term relationship.
That is your two real choices. I do not look back at listings lost, or clients who move on. I give "easy out" clauses on my contracts. I hope that helps.
Tony Barker, Houston Texas Real Estate Broker
Premiere Home Realty Inc. 832-867-0835
Win-Win or No Deal!
Hi Dean,
I just posted a very similar blog on this subject last week. Congrats on getting yours featured. Good post.
http://activerain.com/blogsview/1282761/thank-you-bryant-tutas-for-giving-me-fodder-for-my-next-post-rant
You can add the following to the list:
Contractors are Con Men and Thieves
Lawyers are Opportunists and crooks
Lenders are Sharks
Doctors are Quacks
Clergy are Child Molesters
Politicians are all Bought by Lobbies and Special Interest Groups
Car Salesmen are Slimy Lot Lizards
Media are all Left Wing Pin Heads
Female Teachers have sex with Young Boys
Cops are all on the Take
Students are Lazy Good For Nothings or Radical Protesters
Celebrities are all demented perverts
The President of The United States of America is an incompetent Commie and A Stealth Radical Muslim Terrorist
And Buyers are All Liars.
So now tell me where does that leave our Society? Are there any good guys left anywhere? Or should we perhaps start changing our perspective and attitude towards our fellow man just a tad. We may be surprised just how much more productive we would be and how fast we might spin ourselves out of this quagmire and back into productivity and prosperity.
Yes, I have experienced terrible situations and terrible people. I try to stay optimistic. However, I always keep my eyes and ears wide open.
I read this whole thread. I'm now very depressed. By the way I do everything I can to avoid having this happen to me.
Respect? OK, I've got one for you. Nine years ago a buyer walks in to an agent's office and wants to buy a specific house, a spec home offered FSBO by a builder. The agent contacts the builder, negotiates a commission, writes the offer, presents it, it's accepted. The buyer then DISAPPEARS NEVER TO BE FOUND! The earnest money check bounces. The builder is livid with the agent to the point that nine YEARS later the builder approaches the Realtor and physically assaults him over the matter. The builder lost nothing, put his house back on the market within two days and then this. People have lost respect for one another, period, so it's best not to seek it or expect it. Give it if you'd like, just don't expect it from anyone and you won't be disappointed. Oh, and if you expect the disrespect, you'll minimize the opportunities for someone to disrespect you.
Respectfully,
John and Janis-
I am with you. It is a sad commentary on our society that there is so much hate and back-stabbing.
I used to think it was only lucrative professions that were targets of all this hatred, but my friend who is Director of a "non-profit" for the handicapped has had to deal with it constantly. It's just human nature.